Gender roles here--it's not what you think

Gender roles are very set here so there is no question as to what job is whose responsibility.
For example: 
A woman's job it not to kill a chicken--it's the man's. But it is a woman's job to cook it. In other provinces women do kill chickens, just not in Cabo Delgado. 
It is the man's job to drive the bicycle--often with one or more passengers. And also they drive motorcycles and fix them when they break too. Only recently have the "liberated" women starting driving bikes and motos. And let me tell you, it's super hard to get on one when wearing a capalana.
Sewing, go figure, is a man's job. The women won't do it because a sewing machine is just that, a machine. They are the old fashioned kind of machine with the foot pump.
Working a maxamba is a job for men and women. They don't have plows, tillers or tractors. Everything is done with a hoe with a two foot long handle. It's backbreaking work and long hours which is yet another reason they are so buff.
And it's a woman's job to pilar (grind) the corn, de-hull the rice and do all the cooking. The pilão is a heavy wood trunk about two feet tall. About 8 inches makes up the stand and the other 1 & 1/2 foot of trunk is hollowed out and they use a four foot long heavy stick to pound the food inside if the pilão. (It's hard to explain, but believe me, it's really intense work that they do every single day Atleast once a day). No one grinds the corn into flour too far in advance because it's more likely to get bugs in it or to mold. 

Oh Boy

Kids are so impressionable.
And it's amazing how much they seek approval. I guess it's a lifelong thing. But I was reminded how big of a part I can play in that by encouraging the good.
I have talked before about my four favorites: Dinis, Momade, Pedro and Pedrito. They do not have birth parents and maybe because of previous life experiences, maybe because of personality, maybe for other reasons, they are underdogs. They are troublemakers but with their smiles could get away with a lot.
There are a lot of kids that could fit in this description, maybe we just don't always know their stories. But they just need someone to encourage them, to give a pat on the back and even a scolding every once in a while.
And I think I have underestimated the power of the opposite gender. Now that I think about it, guys would do a lot to get the attention of a girl, right? And it doesn't always matter if it's because he is trying to impress her to eventually see if he could convince her to go out with him. Guys want to please their moms, their aunts, their grandmas. They want to please their nice teachers, usually girls. They want to please friends and maybe even their friends' big sisters. Maybe that's an exaggeration, but maybe not. Depends on how cool get big sisters are.
Today Nelito was doing pull-ups on the playground. He was the only one even close to the playground. As soon as I walked over, no joke, less than thirty seconds and there were 15 elementary age boys all trying to squeeze on the pull-up bar or doing the monkey bars and looking to see if I noticed.
I need to take advantage of this power! In a good way, of course! Now that I know that they want me to be pleased with them, I need to be more intentional about speaking well of others, of encouraging fair play, of being kind and encouraging intellect--aka school attendance and grades! We have guessed that some kids come to church simply to watch the white girls sing and attempt to dance. So, girls, use your influence for good. Guys, make sure the girls you are seeking approval from are girls of character, morality and integrity.
"And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works" Hebrews 10:24

For a Good Read

Allow me to do a book review.

The Dirks Escape
C. Brandon Rimmer
Jeremy Books
1978

This is the true story of the journey of a man and his family as they escape from the Holocaust. Yes, the Holocaust has always interested me. It's a horrifying part of history which as horrible as it was, could happen again with the decisions and attitudes of modern culture. With the individualistic, "I look out for number one, I can't be responsible for anyone else' attitude. This book shows the past but also warns about the future. As you read you will evaluate culture and your role in it. Here is a quote from Gerhard Dirks to further motivate you to read this. And to motivate you further, I'll put a link so you can order it.

"Sometimes we do learn from history. I believe that history is repeating itself. But let me tell you something about looking back. You look back and remember things that you did and regret doing. That is bad, but not as bad as something else. The worst is what you didn't do and regret not doing--that is what hurts. You don't realize at the time how important it is...
"Such things are most important, for by doing nothing, the day comes when you share in the guilt of those who did actively wrong. You share not just in the blame, you share in the guilt, too, but that you did not see at the time.
"...the organized and dedicated minority, in the end, dominates the inept majority. You find yourself going along. Then you, too, are guilty. You always wonder, 'had I spoken, had it acted, would hints have been different?' It will always haunt you...
"The problem is like a programmed computer. A man programs himself by his deep desires--maybe he's not even aware of some of he,--by his environment, and by the sum total of all previous decisions. It is true, there can be more--but in those days I didn't know that. So, we see most people like machines putting together an answer to a questionable me the answer is the product of what has gone before and has been stored, consciously and subconsciously.
This is why it is so important in our culture here in America today, to see what goes into our young people, from their entertainment, from their education. Is there much that makes for what you might call 'standing power'? The input that makes possible a real choice? I don't think so. The things hat happened in pre-nazi Germany are beginning to happen here in this country.
"First, there is a question about how can something be right and something else be wrong? We are or old that moral absolutes are all nonsense. White becomes gray and black becomes gray. You cannot expect a computer to come up with the correct answer if you have excluded from the input necessary information. You cannot expect a young person to stand openly for what is right when everything that gives him input, all his culture, it's entertainment, it's news and it's educational system, are based on a theory of relative values. The information needed to make one stand up against social pressures, the reason for standing, is being programmed out of the young human machine in America.
It is not good." (Quote from Gerhard Dirks, The Dirks Escape pp37-39)

 If you want to order it, go here